I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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