You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize