honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
