Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
