I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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