You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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