They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
