I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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