Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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