She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
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