i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
