my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize