my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Life is so much better after having sex.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
