you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
You pole danced in your parka.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Your penis caused this!
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize