just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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