I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
