NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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