Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
