YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
