By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
