Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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