yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize