Tell her she can't have a vagina
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
