Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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