we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
