her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
