and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize