How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
