what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
