Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
