She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize