yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
