Everything about him screamed your future.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
