he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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