happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
