That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
