i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
