STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
