I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
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