Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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