I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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