I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize