One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
