think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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