he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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