Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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