Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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