New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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