well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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