you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
