if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
