Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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