hell yes lets make some ravioli
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize